this is a doug

Month

January 2011

22 posts

“No matter the outcome of events in Egypt, there is no escaping the fact that the country essentially runs on a pyramid scheme.” —Chuck, on the topic of the runs (via chuckhistory)
Jan 31, 201117 notes
This is why I stopped doing open mics in Guadalajara → cbsnews.com
Jan 24, 2011
#music #grenade #murder #drugs #Guadalajara
Jan 24, 2011115 notes
George Clooney is not safe for children

Sadly, George Clooney’s shameful flaunting of his malaria is certain to inspire kids everywhere to experiment with malaria.

Jan 21, 20113 notes
#celbrities #role model #Clooney #Malaria #kids #impressionable #responsibility #Hollywood #George #shame #Batman #movies #film
“Never fire a gun in the shower. It will come back to haunt you.” —Doug Lenox on Gun Control
Jan 21, 20111 note
#guns #cleanliness #Palin #showering #brady bill #2nd Amendment
Sundance hates the future of Art.

Proof: For the seventh year in a row, they rejected my stop motion/snowboarding/coming of age/porno, even though it keeps getting better and longer each time I submit it.

Jan 18, 20112 notes
#sundance #film #festival #snowboarding #porno #art #movie #snow #coming of age #stop motion #animation #rejection #future
Just prank called a morgue.

I asked them if their refrigerator was running.

They said they didn’t have any refrigerators. They just use travel coolers with ice packs because it’s cheaper.

Jan 18, 2011
#morgue #prank calls #creepy #not true
“I’m pretty sure if MLK were alive today, he’d be doing precisely what we’re all doing right now: celebrating the birthday of Kid Rock.” —Doug Lenox on the decline of American culture.
Jan 17, 2011
#MLK #Day #Martin Luther King Jr. #Kid Rock #People who pretend to be from Detroit
“Nothing says I love you like a plastic surgery gift card.” —Doug Lenox on Gifting
Jan 14, 2011
#gift #anniversary #birthday #present #plastic surgery #gift #card
“Drinking alcohol is a great way to relieve the stress caused by your addiction to drinking alcohol.” —Doug Lenox on Wellness
Jan 14, 20111 note
#health #wellness #alcohol #addiction #stress #drinking
“My new Zodiac sign is the same as my old one. It’s: I DON’T FUCKING BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY!” —Doug Lenox on Astrology
Jan 14, 20111 note
#astrology #stupid #beliefs #moon #hippies #cancer #gemini #zodiac #sky #sun #new #bad convesrations #news
The next big thing in Hot Topic t-shirt designs.

“Law enforcement officials said Friday they have multiple photos of Jared L. Loughner posing with a Glock 9mm gun next to his naked buttocks and dressed in a bright red g-string.”

Jan 14, 20111 note
#Loughner #Hot Topic #offensive #teen angst #mall #clothing #lunch boxes #goth #Tucson #Arizona
Jan 13, 20112 notes
#childhood #elementary school #humor #support #young fashion victim #poppys #santa cruz
Jan 13, 20111 note
#polymory #gossip #celebrity #gawker #perez hilton #brangelina #BraJonGelina #Jolie #Pitt #future #entertainment #traids #three way
Travelmastersizers → chuckmccarthy.com

chuckhistory:

This is a new show idea Doug and I just came up with. Contact me if you want to executive produce it. No really… Seriously… Stop saying, “Yeah right.” I’m serious. 

Genre: Comedy LOGLINE: Two friends adventures in capitalism and drinking. Travelmastersizers  follows two friends, Ninja and Chuck, as they try to build a beer cooler empire. Ninja’s grandfather dies and he receives a fairly substantial inheritance, which he immediately pours into developing and producing a beer cooler/segway called the Travelmastersizer Master Cooler. The Travelmastersizer is the top of the line cooler… so far at the top of the line that no one can afford it, and his plans for beer cooler domination don’t include and forethought on distribution. Ninja brings his friend Chuck into the mix, to help him with marketing and sales. The two travel from trade-show to trade-show, meeting to meeting trying to generate interest in the Travelmastersizer. Chuck constantly tries to convince Ninja to scale back the Travelmastersizer, but Ninja is totally inflexible. Making matters worse, their efforts must stop any time there is a Steelers football game or (2-3 other sports teams). The show mixes scripted content with reality as all the trade-show public reactions etc. would be real people reacting to the price of the Travelmastersizer and the ridiculousness of its features. It seems that they will be ruined until a season finale phone call from actor Kiefer Sutherland promises to turn everything around. That’s right- Jack Bauer wants to invest… but there is a problem. Kiefer likes the Patriots… 

Jan 12, 20115 notes
“Home theaters are a great idea.” —Abraham Lincoln
Jan 12, 20112 notes
#home theater #lincoln #ideas #guns #assasination
Added an interests section to my resume in an attempt to broaden my appeal.

My interests: money, women, and pottery.

Jan 12, 20111 note
#work #resume #interests #job #pottery #life
Jan 10, 201114 notes
“In an ideal world, the 2010 NYC Blizzard TV movie would feature Nic Cage as Bloomberg, and Mickey Rourke as the snow.” —Doug Lenox on Improving Amerca
Jan 7, 20111 note
#America #blizzard #movie #tv #television #nyc #snowpocalypse

I’ve been away from my apartment for so long that I’m worried I’ve forgotten how to irritate the shit out of my girlfriend.

Jan 4, 2011

I’ve decided that this will be the year I get around to suing Napster for decimating the value of my REO Speedwagon CD collection.

Jan 3, 2011
#music #cd's #financial crisis #REO Speedwagon #Napster

This coming year, I vow to exercise less, drink more, and achieve as little as possible. Set attainable goals people!

Jan 1, 20111 note
#Resolutions #New Year's #2011 #goals
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